My dearest ass kickers,
This is a personal post. You know you can always count on me to be authentic and honest with you and this is no exception. I haven’t written anything new in a long time. We had a big move recently, before that it was summer where I backed off on work related projects and before that was my book launch. And that’s where this story starts.
The book was a big deal to me. Not only was it a big project and a life-long dream come true, but it put me in a place of vulnerability I had never been before. Sure, I’ve blogged since ’07, have told my story of divorce, a major break-up with a con-man, and my sobriety, but the book really put me out there in the Universe for all to see. I was putting my life's work into the world and it was very, very scary. It took a tremendous amount of vulnerability and courage and at the end of the project I felt I had used it all up. I had no more. It was as if I had run 100 miles straight while 9 months pregnant, gave birth and needed to sleep for about 3 days. Well, I’ve slept for about 4 months now and I can honestly say I really needed it.
As I feel ready to rise up from the ashes, I reflect back on that time of the book launch and promotion. Not only was it scary, but it took me to a new level of my own work, one that forced me to look at some old shit all over again. What I mean by that is old feelings of insecurity and fear. This happened when I went through coach training in 2008 and again somewhat when I launched YKAL in 2010. And it’s funny how I forgot that it would happen to me– I tell my clients all the time that when we uplevel our lives we face old gremlins all over again– gremlins that we thought we had worked out and said good-bye to a long time ago. Then, we do something big and often exciting, and get sucker punched in the face.
And I really do look at it as a good thing. An uncomforatble-as-fuck thing, but for the greater good of my soul. You see, we aren’t really growing when things are smooth sailing. When things get hard, when we do new things, when we dance with fear and courage together then the real growth, change and beauty happen. (Tweet that!) So, we can either hide indefinitely or rest as long as we need to and carry on.
So, ass kicker, I hope you read this and think about your own life. I hope you realize that it’s 100 percent normal to feel a bit “hungover” after you’ve done something courageous and scary, no matter the outcome. I hope you realize that that is good for your soul. I hope you realize miracles can come out of times that are challenging and that it’s okay to take a break. I also hope you relaize that whatever level of courage you’re at, is perfect for you.
And what this means for YKAL is that big stuff is coming. Better than ever, I have plans to change your life and help you create your most kick-ass life imaginable.